The Ex Factor

I have had 4 major long term relationships in my life, and I only keep in touch with one of them...and you all know who that is. He and I don't talk on the phone a lot because for whatever reason it doesn't get akward, but it gets hard, because even though we've been apart for 2 years now there are still some pretty strong feelings (at least on my side, and I'm pretty sure his). We have lived our lives seperately now with little contact except the occasional e-mail or visit when I go home.

We talked on the phone last night and had a real conversation, and it was nice. We joked around like old times and it was good to rememeber what that felt like. I know everyone says I shouldn't talk to him or see him, but I want to. I'd rather he be in my life in whatever capacity, than not in it.

He's the guy that used to come home after a gruling 14 hour day, wake me up, put his head on my stomach and we'd talk for an hour just to catch up and he'd make me laugh...at 2am...and it was great. He used to buy me dumb presents like a talking Crocodile Hunter keychain because he knew I'd laugh at it. He gave me dumb nicknames, but I loved them. He'd play the best air bass and air guitar and had a love for music that was just awesome. We used to chase each other around the kitchen in our socks and pajama pants and those days with him were some of the very best times of my life.